Moms: Have you been a victim of 'mom-shaming?' Here's what to do - Cleveland 19 News Cleveland, OH

Moms: Have you been a victim of 'mom-shaming?' Here's what to do

(Source: Facebook) (Source: Facebook)
CLEVELAND, OH (WOIO) -

It happened to Beyoncé for not combing her daughter's hair right.

It happened to Pink when she posted a picture of her young son near the stove.

Victoria Beckham suffered the backlash when she posted a picture of her kissing her daughter on the lips.

"Mommy-shaming," or criticizing moms for their parenting choices, seems to be as widespread as ever - so widespread that a mom in Berea created a "judge-free" Facebook page that has thousands of followers.

Colleen Carter is a wife and a working mom of two. When you meet her, it's hard to believe that the well put together mom says she's felt the sting of mommy-shaming.

She says she felt extreme judgment during a trip to the grocery store as she pushed a large cart with her kids inside.

"I made a wide turn, and I knocked over the entire table of bakery and was mortified, obviously. Everyone was just staring at me. I was getting warm. I was like, 'Oh my gosh.' I'm trying to get it together. Eventually, an employee came over, but the patrons of the store - no one stopped to help," described Carter.

That experience affected Carter so much that she created a private Facebook page. What happened next - blew her away.

"It became Judge Free Moms - which is 18 months later - a movement," said Carter.

Carter says the thousands of people on Judge Free Moms are proof that moms are fed up with the rude and hurtful comments.

Bashing and unkind words are not allowed on the Judge Free Moms Facebook Page. Why do you even have to tell people that? Why are people so hard on moms?

"I feel like moms have always been hard on each other, but in the world now, with social media, it's just so much more in their face - the mommy guilt," said Dr. Carolyn Ivers-Landis, a Psychologist at University Hospitals' Rainbow Babies and Children's Hospital.

Dr. Ivers-Landis recommends that mom's who feel they have been judged think through how they want to respond and not go into attack mode.

"Instead, I would say to the person, you know that's an interesting perspective, or I'll think about that - could there be something that's a problem with what I am doing? Thanks for pointing that out. Or, maybe if you really, really disagree, just say no I strongly disagree with that. I chose to do something different with my child or my family," said Ivers-Landis.

Carter hopes that moms will try to be more kind to each other and think twice before writing something that could hurtful.

"I think we worry about our kids being bullied, and we worry about how they are treated at school or on social media, and we forget that the same rules apply to us as adults," said Carter.

Dr. Ivers-Landis says that if you feel the need to make a comment about another mom's parenting choice, be careful when you are choosing your words - offer your comment as suggestion and say something like, 'Have you tried this?' Stay away from coming across as being critical.

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